Did 'Marathon Mom' ignore her kids? Why a viral video is enraging runners and mothers | CBC News (2024)

Natalie Stechyson · CBC News

· Posted: May 28, 2024 4:00 AM EDT | Last Updated: May 28

Personal trainer Luciana Grandi Lourençãowas about to win thePresidente Prudente Half Marathon in Brazil.

But before she crossed the 21-kilometrerace's finish line, she had to dodge a couple of hazards in the road: her children.

In a May 5 video thathasgone viral since it wasshared on TikTok, Lourençãocan be seen running down a hill, triumphantly pumping a fist in the air as she's about to cross the finish line with the time of 1:41:01, which would net her thefirst-place finish among the female runners.

And then, a man, later confirmed to be her husband, pushesLourenção'syoung daughters onto the course. They run toward their mother, butLourençãoveers to the right and darts across the finish line without looking back. Behind her, the man shrugs.

The videomade headlines aroundthe world — some blaming the dadfor "sabotaging"his wife's moment, some saying Lourençãoignored her kids— andignited social media, where the original video has more than 16million views and counting.

The commentsare just as heated, with lots of people sayingthe video really represents how men don't take women's commitments outside the family seriously. Lourençãolater clarified she and her husband had initially planned for her kids to cross the finish line with her, but she changed her mind when she realized she could win if she kept up her pace.

The video, for many, is symbolicof the kind of barriers mothers face.

"She has the choice to either pick them upand not win the marathon, or run around them and win," one woman posted ina video response.

"Mother runner ignored kids OR dad sabotages marathon mom by using kids?" wrote a running coach on Instagram.

Sport double standard

The video is disappointing, said Dawn Trussell, an associateprofessor of sport management at Brock University who studies motherhood andsports. In her view, it represents a bigger problem than what appearsto bea dad's "problematic" timing.

"Mothers who are athletes often have to counter the unrealistic and self-sacrificing expectations of motherhood," Trussell told CBC News.

"Motherhood expectations can include dedicating all of one's time, energy and resources to be considered a 'good mother' while sacrificing their athletic identities."

WATCH | About the mom load:

Studies have shown thatmotherhood discriminationin sport is real. For instance, recent research published in the journal Communication &Sport analyzed the media portrayal of two Canadian elite athletes (boxer Mandy Bujold andbasketball player Kim Gaucher), finding theywere discriminated against based on their motherhood status during lead-up to the 2020Tokyo Olympics. The researchers called it a "motherhood penalty."

In 2022, a University of Alberta study suggested elite athletes who become mothers need better support from sporting bodies to continue their careers after birth.Prof. Margie Davenport with the faculty of kinesiology, sport, and recreationexplained that, for female athletes,the window of peak performance and the window for fertility overlap.

"Male athletes don't run into the same issues. The level of stress is unimaginable," said Davenport in a newsrelease at the time.

Meanwhile, Canadian researchhas also shown that becoming a parent is associated with decreased physical activity participation —especially for mothers. A 2022 report fromCanada's Sport Information Resource Centre, asports advocacy organization that partners with the federal government,explained that up to 75 percent of mothers experience unique barriers to physical activity, ranging from guilt,pressure, and stress to a lack of time, support, or child care.

Yet, a lot of mothers have intense relationships with running. The activity offers emotional and physical autonomy — something often in short supply for moms. And it allows an identity outside of parenting: "runner."

"It was a release. And it was precious 'me-time'," Scottish runner and writer Keri Wallace wrote last year in Ultra Racer Magazine.

In the article, sheexplains why she turned back to running "too soon" after she became a mother, not waiting to build up her core,and just shot "like a rocket out the door."

"Running is the best antidote to the struggles of motherhood."

'I had to finish the run'

Ina video posted to her Instagram Sunday,Lourençãorespondedto the controversy, saying she wanted to clear things up.

In the video, filmed in Portuguese and translated byCBCNews, Lourençãoexplains she hadn't trained properlyand didn't expect to win. The daybefore the race,she and her husband had agreed she would "cross the finish line with the girls without knowing if I was going to win or not."

But she did better than she expected. And when it was time to finish the race, she said, "I saw the girls on the side but I had to finish the run and win. After that, I hugged my daughters."

The video didn't show thatmoment, or the onewhere she took her girls onto the podium when she collected her medal.

She lamented that she "didn't make my arrival as beautiful as we had planned," but added she knows she'll have other opportunities.

Her husband, PedroLourenção, told a Brazilian news sitehe had no idea the second runner was so close behindhis wife.

"I didn't do anything to be malicious, nothing to get in the way," he said, while adding that he's avoiding reading the comments on social media.

Meanwhile, the trending search termon TikTokforLourenção'soriginal video is "Marathon Mom ignores her kids," and a number of people have commented negatively on the fact that she runs past them in order to win.

Some have also wondered who the man is she's seen hugging after she crosses the finish line, joking that she picked a new husband.

Lourençãocleared that up on Instagram, too, noting that he's her brother and fellow athlete.

"We are an active family and we will continue to be."

WATCH | What drives runners?

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